Moral

The 1st Affair

A married man was having an affair with his secretary.

One day they went to her place and made love all afternoon. Exhausted, they fell asleep and woke up at 8pm.

The man hurriedly dressed and told his lover to take his shoes outside and rub them in the grass and dirt.

He put on his shoes and drove home.

"Where have u been?" his wife demanded.

"I can't lie to you," he replied, "I'm having an affair with my secretary. We had sex all afternoon."

"You lying bastard!, you've been playing golf!," his wife shouted.




The 2nd Affair

A middle-aged couple had two beautiful daughters but always talked about having a son.

The decided to try one last time for the son they always wanted.

The wife got pregnant and delivered a healthy baby boy.

The joyful father rushed to the nursery to see his new son.

He was horrified at the ugliest child he had ever seen.

He told his wife, "There's no way I can be the father of this baby. Look at the two beautiful daughters I fathered! Have you been fooling around behind my back?"

The wife smiled sweetly and replied, "Not this time!"




The 3rd Affair

A man walked into a cafe, went to the bar and ordered a beer.

"Certainly, Sir, that'll be one cent."

"One cent?" the man thought.

He glanced at the menu and asked, "How much for a nice juicy steak and a bottle of wine?"

"A nickel," the barman replied.

"A nickel?" exclaimed the main. "Where's the guy who owns this place?"

The bartender replied, "Upstairs, with my wife."

The man asked, "What's he doing upstairs with your wife?"

"The same thing I'm doing to his business down here," the bartender replied.



The 4th Affair

Jake was dying. His wife sat at the bedside.

He looked up and said weakly, "I have something I must confess."

"There's no need to," his wife replied.

"No," he insisted, "I want to die in piece. I slept with your sister, your best friend, her best friend and your mother!"

"I know, I know," she replied. "Now just rest and let the poison work."






Moral of the story: Don't get involved in any extra marital affairs.